Lord of Cinders

Kiri Genin Posts : 110 Join date : 2015-10-02

Name: Cataclysm
Rank: S
Type: Ninjutsu
Element: Fire
Range: 100m
Handseals: Dragon Boar Ox Dog Rat Dragon
Speed: 110
Description: Upon completing the required hand seals, the user will generate and expel a massive wave of fire, heat, and superheated ash and pumice. The wave expands outwards at an alarming place and assaults everything and everyone in its radius indiscriminately, consuming vegetation in an instant, rapidly boiling away water, and eliminating organic life with ease. While this particular technique has low impact upon physical structures, it easily bypasses most by simply flowing through any openings or around any walls. The true danger of the cataclysm lies in the immediate danger it posses to living beings as the ash and heat do not simply damage people but encases them in the ash and burying the surroundings in fine, white silt-like deposits like a Pompeii style explosion. Even fleeting contact with the wave, were such a thing possible, can prove life threatening as the intense heat causes massive burn upon contact and the aggregate bits of ash can stick to a person, continuing to burn and smolder for some time after. As with most fire techniques, the addition of wind techniques conflates with this, increasing the range and speed by fifty percent with the addition of B rank or higher wind techniques. Finally, the area afflicted remains inhospitable for some time after, requiring a cleanup period as the ash, even once cooled, can cause respiratory problems if inhaled and the petrified bodies must be removed. This technique receives no chakra discounts.

Name: Lord of Cinders
Rank: A
Type: Ninjutsu
Element: Fire
Range: 50m
Handseals: Dragon Ox Ram Dragon
Speed: N/A
Description: A technique which functions similarly to the Hidden Mist technique and its countless variants, this ability allows the user to release, generally by exhalation, a huge cloud superheated ash and soot. This obscures vision to a certain extent and confuses sensors as the ash cloud hold the user's chakra, however the main purpose of this is to create an environment hostile to enemies as the cloud not only burns those caught within it but damages the respiratory system. The soot and ash is comprised of tiny flecks of stone and volcanic glass which, upon inhalation, shreds the alveoli of the lungs. Prolonged exposure to the cloud can lead to massive damage of the respiratory system, internal bleeding, third degree burns, and, of course, death.

Kazekage Posts : 608 Join date : 2015-03-15

Enkai wrote:: Name: Cataclysm
Rank: S
Type: Ninjutsu
Element: Fire
Range: 100m
Handseals: Dragon Boar Ox Dragon
Speed: 110
Description: Upon completing the required hand seals, the user will generate and expel a massive wave of fire, heat, and superheated ash and pumice. The wave expands outwards at an alarming place and assaults everything and everyone in its radius indiscriminately, consuming vegetation in an instant, rapidly boiling away water, and eliminating organic life with ease. While this particular technique has low impact upon physical structures, it easily bypasses most by simply flowing through any openings or around any walls. The true danger of the cataclysm lies in the immediate danger it posses to living beings as the ash and heat do not simply damage people but encases them in the ash and burying the surroundings in fine, white silt-like deposits like a Pompeii style explosion. Even fleeting contact with the wave, were such a thing possible, can prove life threatening as the intense heat causes massive burn upon contact and the aggregate bits of ash can stick to a person, continuing to burn and smolder for some time after. As with most fire techniques, the addition of wind techniques conflates with this, increasing the range and speed by fifty percent. Finally, the area afflicted remains inhospitable for some time after, requiring a cleanup period as the ash, even once cooled, can cause respiratory problems if inhaled and the petrified bodies must be removed.

Okay. A few things here.

1. This receives no Chakra discounts. Please add in the description a general size of the flames. Height and width will be appreciated.

2. No to the wind Jutsus adding 50% to whatever. This is too vague. There are different kinds of wind Jutsus so lets get specific here.

The Jutsu also has a lot going on. This is like a Volcano erupting which is a bit much. So may need to tone it down some. Fire's weakness is water so I dont see this just powering through water. I suggest we also get Jutsu and rank specific as much as possible. Durability levels etc also needed. This is just at a glance. The range needs toning down. Number of hand seals increased please.

Name: Lord of Cinders
Rank: A
Type: Ninjutsu
Element: Fire
Range: 50m
Handseals: Dragon
Speed: N/A
Description: A technique which functions similarly to the Hidden Mist technique and its countless variants, this ability allows the user to release, generally by exhalation, a huge cloud superheated ash and soot. This obscures vision to a certain extent and confuses sensors as the ash cloud hold the user's chakra, however the main purpose of this is to create an environment hostile to enemies as the cloud not only burns those caught within it but damages the respiratory system. The soot and ash is comprised of tiny flecks of stone and volcanic glass which, upon inhalation, shreds the alveoli of the lungs. Prolonged exposure to the cloud can lead to massive damage of the respiratory system, internal bleeding, third degree burns, and, of course, death.

1. Tone down please. Volcanic ash etc. Thats a lot going on with the jutsu. How long does it stay active? Weakness? Level of sensory skill needed to be able to sense. How does it affect the dojutsus? More hand seals please. Size of the affected area etc.

Kiri Genin Posts : 110 Join date : 2015-10-02

Cataclysm
- 1. Um, why? As for size, it's an expanding dome so the size changes as it spreads out.
- 2. How is this too vague? Fire is already strong against wind, this is more clear than 'fire beats wind.'
- I don't really know why a pseudo-volcanic explosion sans lava is a bit much. Fire's weakness is water, so yeah an A or S rank water defense will be very effective in protecting from this.
Lord of Cinders
- Tone down the fact that it uses volcanic ash?
- It stays active as long as it's maintained and the user pays the upkeep.
- Weakness: probably water, since it's fire. You could bury it with a huge amount of earth I guess.
- Generic sensing would become null essentially, since the whole of the mist would seem like an extension of the user. Advanced sensory abilities, like Mind's Eye, or contact style sensory abilities would be fine, though I'd imagine non-contact sensory abilities would lose range.
- Dojutsu: It blocks vision, so they are blocked. Penetrative vision is, as usual, unaffected.
- Size of effected area is 50m in a rough circle centered on the user's position when activating it.

So what's the rule of thumb on hand seal number?

Kazekage Posts : 608 Join date : 2015-03-15

1. For what you're attempting to do with this. The Jutsu is more like a limited technique. Thats my reason for saying no Chakra discount.

2. It is vague when you add in wind Jutsu simply boost the range or whatever by 50%. Are you saying a D-rank Jutsu can do that this? Hence why I say lets get Jutsu specific here. As for size changing as it spreads out. Again its going over the top a little, especially when you take into consideration this does nothing to your Character in terms of exhaustion etc. The site is pretty liberal and meh when it comes to such things. But this is why one sticks within a specific range, size, power specifics of a Jutsu. As it stands, you could clear out things in large quantities with only one Jutsu. Something which Bijuu attacks usually do.

3. As for the pseudo volcano stuff. See above in order to gauge my feelings on the whole deal.

0. Lord of Cinders. You have soot, volanic ash, glass, tiny rocks and whatever going on. Burning, obstructing sensory and other things. It needs toning down. Like are you intending on causing global warming with this soot? As that is one of the main causes behind such things.

Hand seals. I like to see 6+ hand seals when dealing high level stuff. At times you may get away with 5+ hand seals. But I don't mind compromising on some things.

Kiri Genin Posts : 110 Join date : 2015-10-02

1. Fair point. Added in.
2. Tweaked this. Now is increased only with the introduction of B rank or higher wind jutsu. For the size change, that would just be a consequence of this being like a shock wave in how it propagates. It doesn't go beyond the stated range though if that's an issue. But yes it is a wide range ability.
3. Volcano stuff: this isn't an actual volcano, there is no lava, and I don't really see an overt issue with this.
0. Volcanic ash is made of tiny bits of rock, ash, and volcanic glass. It burns because it's hot, it obstructs sensory abilities because that seems to be what these mist-themed things do, it's dangerous to inhale as any fumes from any fire would be. But no, I don't intend on causing global warming; soot is not the main contributing factor to climate change.

Extra hand seals added.

Kazekage Posts : 608 Join date : 2015-03-15

Thank you for trying to cooperate with me.

Cataclysm:

1. Good with the no Chakra discount.
2. Lets look at speed, range and power. Current range: 100 and speed 110+ 50%= 150m range and speed of 165 even though the site's cap is at 150. Even with that 150 speed cap, the opponent has no way of reacting. Since they're going to be burned out before they can call the fire service. Now then, considering all this, do you not find this a little over the top? Without the extra speed boost then the speed is can get a pass. Then we have the range going far and beyond again.
3. Yes water is a weakness etc. But in the jutsu it states being able to rapidly boil away water etc. Again this Jutsu is all powerful considering its not just fire, but the volcanic elements that comes with it. So I wholeheartedly suggest you tone this thing down. At present I don't see this getting approved in its current state.

Kiri Genin Posts : 110 Join date : 2015-10-02

2. Honestly, no, this doesn't seem too crazy too me, particularly in light of what has been approved here (yeah yeah separate issue). If a specified increase in power for an S rank when struck with an element which it both is strong against and is known to be bolster canonically by is a problem, I'll just remove it and do the old "the fire rofl ate the wind and got lots more powerful" for the remaining twenty days of use it will have.

However, let's get real here: the site has a HUGE population of people who consistently move at or near the 150 speed cap. Ryu literally just entered a thread in which there will probably not be any fighting and yet he still activated Sage Mode so that he could run around at 150 speed because fast iz gud. So no, even at 150 speed in that specific situation I have have literally no faith that people won't somehow manage to avoid this.
3. This was not intended as "this will boil away all water instantly." I can word this better if you like. What I meant is that ambient water (like puddles) and low rank water techniques (D, maaaaaybe C rank) would be boiled away. So if you have Hidden Mist going, that isn't going to protect you. And A rank water barrier will still be extremely effective against this. This should help, yes?

Kazekage Posts : 608 Join date : 2015-03-15

And that is precisely why everyone is having their stuff regraded. So you may have to take a look at the recent site changes and adjust your Jutsu accordingly. Since honestly I can't see this getting a pass right now.

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